Closing the book on another chapter in our lives

It's funny how life changes. And then, in reality, it's really not very funny at all...

Over the past few weeks we've closed the book on another chapter in our lives. It was one that we all knew was coming....we were expecting it. And you'd think that when you're prepared, it's all good.

However, sometimes life has a way of throwing you a curve ball when you're least expecting it...even more so, I think....if you're a woman.

Over the past few weeks, we've gone from a home of 6 people to a home of two. Our children both moved out, into their own apartments. The two girls that we had taken into our home, our second daughters, Ariana and Shelby, also moved out as well.

While we are delighted for all of them and happy that they are all independent, happy, doing well and are able to live on their own, it's amazing at the feelings and thoughts that go through your mind once this happens.

I know that many of you are just entering the mommy stages of your lives -- or have small children ---or still have teens at home. Believe me...what they say is so true. It happens, and they'll be gone with the blink of an eye.

It's amazing how that happens. If you're a parent, you know that at times it seems life stands still.

* When you're the mom of a newborn, and you're tired and exhausted, time stands still.

* When you have a sick child....

* When you're the parent of a toddler whom you cannot make happy, who has learned how to throw tantrums (and does it remarkably well)....it seems like life is in slow motion

* When your children enter elementary school and go through hard times, it seems like those days last forever

* Middle schoolers bring on an entirely new set of challenges and worries-- the attitude, the hormones-- what happened to the little boy or girl who used to think you hung the moon?

* And needless to say.....while teen years can be the most amazing times of all....when they're your own children, it can be trying and wonderful all in the same breath.

Like you, I had always heard the old cliche' "before you know it, they'll be gone" and when times were tough, I'd think to myself....ok whatever. Now that I'm there, it seems so true. All the years of raising my children, literally seem like seconds instead of years.

I thought I was prepared. But at the end of the day when everyone had moved out, I went upstairs to close all the bedroom doors, and it hit me like a ton of bricks. "Wow...they're all gone. A chapter of our lives has come to a close".

And then it begins....the mind is a remarkable thing....it has a way of playing tricks on you and making you question all the years that you just put behind you....

* Was I a good mom?

* Did I do my best?

* What did we do right...what did we do wrong? What if...what if...what if....

* What should we have done differently?

* Do they appreciate us...do they love us like we love them?

And then you begin to question your mortality --

* How much longer do I have on this earth?

* What's next?

* Where do we go from here?

* And you ask yourself -- Is this normal or am I going crazy? Are these feelings that everyone has when this chapter of the book of life is closed?

Looking back....the last couple of years have been a tough road to walk....

* The loss of a job

* The loss of my father

* Changing careers in the midst of midlife and during a recession

* Starting a new business

* Like everyone else, just trying to make ends meet

* And now, saying goodbye to our children

But we will be fine. I thank God everyday for giving me all He has given me....Loving parents who loved me no matter what I did and who loved each other until the day my father took his last breath.

For giving me two wonderful children that I have loved more than life. For giving me Chuck...who has been a wonderful father, husband and best friend and who has given me everything he possibly could all these years, who has loved me through thick and thin, for better or worse and who has never left my side. For an incredible family including an amazing sister and step daughter, nieces and nephews.

And I thank God for giving us the opportunity to do what we love to do....to photograph people - to create memories of the good times in their lives, their babies, their children, their teens, the final days of high school, their families, their engagements and their weddings.

We are thankful and appreciative for our association with Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep -- where we have met some of the strongest and most amazing people ever -- those who have lost a child at birth.

We are thankful for Inspiration Through Art (formerly the Littlest Heroes Project) and for the incredible families we have met along the way who are raising children who are either terminally ill, who have faced death with these children, or who have children with life long disabilities.

Our hearts go out to these families....

We are thankful for Wish Upon A Wedding...where we have been given the opportunity to photograph and tell the story of amazing couples --- Couples who are facing a terminal illness or a life altering disability together, and who have chosen to love each other and stay together, and who have chosen to be married and to travel the journey ahead of them as one.

We thank God for our children, our family and for all of you whom we have met along this journey of life. May God bless each and every one of you.

And to Chuck, the best guy in the world...who is an amazing husband and puts up with me through times like this....I love you so much. Thank you for being my guardian angel and for always being there for me.

Beverly

Praying For A Miracle....The Story Of Josh and Rebecca Chandler

Meet Josh and Rebecca Chandler…..

Josh and Rebecca are a young, sweet and amazing couple. They have been married almost seven years and have two children, Caleb 4 and Havanna who is 2. They are expecting their third child, a little boy, in mid July.

Josh is an officer with the Georgia State Patrol. He also works a second job at Hartsfield International airport to help make ends meet. After their second child was born, Rebecca gave up her career in the dental field in order to stay at home with their children.

Josh and Rebecca are having to face something that no young couple should have to deal with….This past February, during an OBGYN visit at Rebecca’s 18^th week, doctors discovered that the baby’s kidneys’ were enlarged and that the amniotic fluid surrounding him was dangerously low. Rebecca was put into the hospital for Valentine’s Day where she stayed for four days. Doctors performed tests and procedures to try and find out what was wrong. The diagnosis was that their baby has Autosomal Recessive Polycystic Kidney Disease (ARPKD)….a parent’s worst nightmare.

Autosomal recessive polycystic kidney disease, ARPKD, is a rare genetic disorder, occurring in approximately 1 in 20,000 individuals. It affects boys and girls equally and often causes significant mortality in the first month of life.
 
If the child survives the newborn period, the chances of survival are good. For these children, approximately one-third will need dialysis or transplantation by the age of 10. However, doctors have told Josh and Rebecca that their baby has only a 1% chance of survival at birth.

Hearing this news was devastating to this young couple. They sought out second opinions from many doctors and specialists throughout Atlanta. Most doctors offered them little to no hope and recommended that they terminate the pregnancy. However, this was not an option for Josh and Rebecca. They made the decision to look at this from a hopeful, positive perspective. They found a wonderful group of doctors out of Northside who have been very upfront with them about PKD, but who are also very supportive at the same time.

They have found help and support through the PKD foundation (www.pkdcure.org) and have met an amazing woman named Julia Roberts, who is the Atlanta liaison for the PKD foundation. Julia has been a tremendous help and support to Josh and Rebecca, providing them with informational and emotional support and with friendship.

Josh and Rebecca continue to choose to look at this situation from the perspective that the “glass is half full” instead of half empty. Although this journey has taken an emotional and financial toll on them, they can already see good things that have come from this:

They have made a life-long friend in Julia from the PKD foundation…and have met countless, wonderful and supportive people along the way.

Caleb’s preschool teacher at Temple Methodist Church has also been tremendously helpful and supportive. Josh and Rebecca, who both come from very different religious upbringings, have begun attending Temple Methodist and are amazed at how people have reached out to them to offer prayer and support to their family.

Good friends have been their pillar of strength.

And of course, Josh and Rebecca have each other to lean on. They say that their two children, Caleb and Havanna, coupled with their love for each other, are what keep them going.

Josh and Rebecca have chosen to name their baby “Nolan”, which means “fighter”. Every day Rebecca counts the number of movements she feels with Nolan….and with every kick and movement she feels, she is hopeful for a miracle.

Josh and Rebecca were referred to us through a friend who told them about our affiliation with the Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep Foundation and with the Littlest Heroes Project. Through the Littlest Heroes Project, we give back to the community by providing complimentary photography sessions and prints to families who have children with terminal illness and/or life altering disabilities. Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep (NILMDTS) is another non-profit organization we are proud and honored to be a part of. Through this organization, we provide complimentary photography to families of infants who will never leave the hospital.

Josh and Rebecca are thankful for the photography services that will be provided to them through the Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep Foundation. We are honored that they have selected us to accompany them to Northside Hospital and to be there to photograph the 1-2 hours that they hope to have with Nolan after he is born.

Beverly recently traveled to Temple to meet Josh, Rebecca, Caleb and Havanna. They wanted us to do a family photo session with them, capturing images of the four of them together while Rebecca is still pregnant. We started out by doing come candid photos of the kids getting ready. Havanna showed me a little silver monogrammed bracelet that she was wearing…I photographed Josh and Rebecca helping the children put on their shoes and did some other candid shots before we headed out.

We started our photo session by traveling just down the road in Temple, to the house where Josh grew up. Coming back to the house brought back many memories for Josh. The house is empty now….but his childhood memories still linger. Caleb and Havanna were drawn to an old tree house where their Daddy used to play. It was fun photographing this loving family together.

We have put together a photography music video of the time I spent getting to know this amazing family. As each day passes, we are all Praying for A Miracle…..

Click Here To View the Video

To learn more about PKD and the PKD Foundation, Click HERE

To learn more about Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep, Click HERE